Friday, October 22, 2010

Losing Possum/Life without Cats

When I first got Possum  from the SPCA, he was only a few months old. He was one of those gorgeous tuxedo cats with long white whiskers and while all the other kitties were madly scrambling about he just sat there looking at me calmly. I had wanted a buddy for Guido, and Possum looked like he'd be a good match. So, I took him home. At the time his name was Eggbert (cruel) and he'd already been adopted once and returned so I knew that I couldn't do that to him again. I called him KrishnaPossum for his calm demeanor. I kept him in a separate room so that Guido would get used to the smell of him and told Guido repeatedly that I wasn't much interested in this new kitty but that he was for him and whenever Guido wasn't watching I'd sneak in and love up that little creature. They became best friends in an intense homoerotic love-fest sleeping with their paws around each other, grooming each other, taking turns chasing each other from one end of the apartment to the other and then turning right around and reversing chaser and chasee. When it came time for Possum to get neutered, no-one warned me that he would smell alien and evil to Guido and Guido kept hissing at him and trying to bite Possums tender regions. I had to keep them in separate rooms and the trauma changed Possum's personality. His nickname became "no sudden moves" and we dropped the Krishna and he became just Possum. It took Possum a long time to realize he was safe and relax more and toward the end of his life he became really mellow and friendly with strangers. While Guido adored Possum, he wasn't so crazy about my adoring Possum and would get really huffy when I pet him. I definitely favored Guido and felt incredibly guilty about this, compensating whenever I could. When Guy came into my life, things got easier and Possum kinda became Guy's cat while also still being mine. At first Guido was really jealous of Guy but he came to love him too.

The cats suffered 3 moves, from San Francisco to Washington State, Washington to Illinois, and then back to California and to Sacramento. Each move was absolute misery and they let us know it the whole way. By the time we moved here Guido was 19 or 20 and Possum 18 or 19. Guido started failing and then died a few months ago. Possum missed him a lot and we gave him all the attention he could ever want but then he started to fade too. We took him to the vet early this morning as he was obviously in distress and put him to sleep. Our cats gave us so much love, laughter, fun, affection, and beauty.  It's insane how much loss hurts and I can't imagine life without them. Winters were always especially wonderful snuggling with them under the covers. What can I say? My heart is breaking. R.I.P. Possum. Later we will bury you in the yard beside Guido.

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